Ode to the Gryllidae

You are a most ugly creature.
There is no quality about you that is redeeming.
A lesson you will soon learn from this teacher.
After which, instead of chirping you might be screaming.

Your back is shiny; your antennae are pointy,
With legs that look like inverted Vs.
You think you're so smart and perhaps home-free
As you forage your way through grass and trees.

What you fail to realize and presume
Is that I'm coming after you.
Be it with my shoe, electric zapper, or a broom--
Oh, yes!  This will be quite the coup.

Do your compound eyes help you see
The broom as its lifted high above?
With squeals by your killer of 'whoopee,'
It sails through the air like the flight of a dove.

Cricket season is high, but your death came with a thump.
I no longer hear your incessant chirping peep.
Finally, you will no longer be able to jump,
And I will be able to get my beauty sleep. 

A Glass Always Full

Think positively.
An eternal optimist
Will have happiness.